Matrimonial Law

At Meyer & Spencer LLP, we take a somewhat unique approach to Matrimonial actions. In short, we believe that every divorce case should be amicably settled. This requires both parties to negotiate in a reasonable manner. Our many years of experience in this area have shown that Judges tend to view these cases in strictly mathematical terms. In our experience, it does not matter which spouse, if any, was at fault causing the breakup. Since the equitable distribution (or financial division) of assets at which a Judge may arrive is based upon known factors and amounts, we believe it does not pay to spend tens of thousands of dollars litigating over issues that will not affect your bottom line.

In cases where child custody is in dispute, the Courts are always going to look at what is in the best interests of the child(ren). In virtually all cases, when awarding child support, the Courts are going to follow the guidelines contained in the Child Support Standards Act. When legal fees run into the tens of thousands of dollars in Matrimonial actions, it is usually because the parties are litigating over child custody. When parties take a realistic approach to what is in the best interests of their children, they will often reach an amicable settlement with each other. Although your marriage may end, when young children are involved, each spouse may remain connected to their ex-spouse for many years. Your children’s best interests dictate that you try to keep this relationship as cordial as possible.

MEYER & SPENCER LLP’S CHILDREN’S SURVIVAL GUIDE

In order to minimize the negative impact that your divorce will have on your children, follow these Rules:

RULE 1	KEEP THE KIDS OUT OF IT – children should not be told of financial disputes, reasons for the breakup, or any other intimate matters between the parties. Having parents who are separated or divorced is hard enough on children; subjecting your kids to arguments will make them feel responsible and will negatively impact their self esteem.
RULE 2	DO NOT USE YOUR KIDS – children should never be used to convey negative messages between the parents. If there are problems with child support, visitation, etc., speak directly with the other parent or have your attorney speak for you. No matter how acrimonious your relationship may be, your children should never hear you say anything disparaging about a person they love very much. This will serve no purpose other than to make a poor impression on your children and set a bad example for them.
RULE 3	PUT THE KIDS FIRST – sometimes a parent may have to sacrifice visitation or extend visitation to enable children to attend other special events. Putting the interests of your children first should always be a paramount concern for any parent.
RULE 4	BE CONSISTENT WITH VISITATION – nothing is more hurtful to a child than when he/she is expecting a visit from a parent who does not show up. Both children and the other parent are entitled to know that the visiting parent will show up on time and drop the children off on time. Being consistent does not mean you cannot also follow Rule 7 . . .
RULE 5	BE WILLING TO BE FLEXIBLE WITH VISITATION – sometimes important events in the kids’ lives fall on days when strict compliance with the visitation schedule may not be in the best interests of your children. Sometimes important events, unavoidable business conflicts or personal emergencies occur in the parents lives which make the exercise of visitation impossible. During the course of your childrens’ lives, any favors exchanged between the parents in these situations will even out in the long run. This will promote better relations between the parents which can only have a positive effect on the children and may pleasantly surprise your spouse.
RULE 6	ENCOURAGE VISITATION – If you are the custodial spouse and must leave your children on a non-visitation day, check to see if the other parent can watch the children instead of hiring a babysitter. This unexpected visitation can only benefit the children.
RULE 7	ENCOURAGE RELATIONSHIPS – Children should be encouraged to maintain and develop loving and respectful relationships with your spouse, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. Just because the parents are splitting up, it does not mean that the children should be deprived of a family structure.
RULE 8	INCLUDE THE NON-CUSTODIAL PARENT – The non-custodial parent should always be encouraged to attend school events, parent-teacher conferences, extra-curricular activities and should take part in medical, religious and scholastic decisions.
RULE 9	ADVISE ON THE CHILDRENS’ WHEREABOUTS – Both parents are entitled to know where there children are at all times. Whether it’s the custodial parent taking the kids on an overnight trip or the non-custodial parent taking the kids on a weekend trip, the other parent should always be told where the kids will be.
RULE 10	HELP WITH SPECIAL OCCASIONS – Children love to give gifts to their parents; however young children cannot go to the store to buy birthday or holiday presents. Both parents should help children so that the children can provide the other parent with gifts on special occasions. This is a nice gesture that will be greatly appreciated by the kids as well as the other parent.

The blueprint for an amicable divorce is reasonable communication between the parties. If the parties can agree on all the major topics, the attorneys’ job (in addition to counseling the client and making sure that the client is not being taken advantage of) will be to file the necessary paperwork to ensure that the parties’ own agreement is reflected in the divorce papers. Parties looking for an amicable divorce must resolve the following issues in order to reach an agreement:

(a) Residence of the parties
(b) Custody and Visitation with Children
(c) Child Support
(d) Children’s College Education
(e) Maintenance/Alimony
(f) Division of Personal Property
(g) Equitable Distribution of marital assets
(h) Taxes and Tax Returns
(i) Life Insurance
(j) 401(k) Plans, Pensions, IRAs
(k) Cash Accounts
(l) Securities and Other Investments
(m) Debts
(n) Disclosure and Legal Representation
(o) Counsel and Other Fees and Expenses

The Courts in this state apply a non-negotiable formula in determining the amount of child support to be paid by the non-custodial parent. The custodial parent is presumed to be using the same percentage of his/her income on child rearing expenses. The non-custodial parent will be required to pay the following percentages of gross income:

For 1 Child 17%
For 2 Children 25%
For 3 Children 29%
For 4 Children 31%
For 5+ Children 35% (minimum)

The Courts will also require to parents to pay a pro-rata share of day care costs and unreimbursed medical expenses based upon the parents’ respective incomes.